What Kind of God Would I Want to Exist?

A gentle question for anyone who has ever wondered.

If you’ve ever paused in the middle of a busy day, or after a tough week, or while staring at the ceiling at night, and thought:

“I hope there’s something more than this…”

—you’re not alone.

This website is for curious people. People who aren’t trying to win arguments. People who simply want to understand the world honestly and live well within it. Whether you’d describe yourself as Christian, skeptical, spiritual-but-not-religious, culturally religious, or “I’m not sure anymore,” you’re welcome here.

So instead of starting with a heavy question like
“Is Christianity true?”
let’s begin with something gentler and more human:

If a God existed… what kind of God would I want Him to be?

This isn’t a trap question.
It’s an invitation to notice something about yourself.

Most of us, if we’re honest, hope that a real God—if He exists at all—would be:

• Good, not cruel.

• Just, but not cold.

• Merciful, but not permissive.

• Powerful enough to fix what’s broken in the world.

• Tender enough to care about our small, private fears.

• Patient when we struggle.

• Wise in ways we can trust even when we don’t understand.

• Near, not distant.

• Knowable, not hiding behind cosmic fog.

We hope for a God who sees everything…
but doesn’t weaponize what He sees.

A God who is strong enough to judge evil…
but still gentle toward people who feel tired, ashamed, or confused.

A God who doesn’t bully, manipulate, or play favorites…
but is still personal and attentive, like a loving parent.

And here’s the interesting thing:

Every culture in the world, across history, carries some version of these hopes.
Even people who say they don’t believe in God still often describe the God they wish existed.

Where did these longings come from?

Why are they so universal?

Why can’t we shake them?

What if our longings say something about reality?

C.S. Lewis once wrote that human desires are not random. Hunger hints at food. Thirst hints at water. Loneliness hints at relationship.

So what does our desire for a perfectly good, wise, just, loving God hint at?

Even if you’ve had negative experiences with religion.

Even if you’ve met Christians who disappointed you.

Even if you’ve drifted from faith.

Even if you’re not sure what you believe today.

Still — the longing persists.

It’s worth noticing.

Where Christianity quietly enters the conversation

I’m not asking you to draw a conclusion yet.
Just consider this one thought:

Jesus is the only figure in history who matches the God we secretly hope for.

A God who is just and merciful.
Powerful and humble.
Holy and deeply compassionate.

A God who doesn’t demand we climb up to Him,
but comes down to us.

A God who doesn’t hide from suffering,
but enters it.

A God who tells the truth about the darkness in the world,
without crushing the bruised or the weary.

A God who invites the skeptic Thomas to touch His scars
instead of shaming him for doubting.

If Christianity is true, then the God your heart quietly hopes for in its most honest moments…
is the God who actually exists.

You don’t need to believe anything today

This first article isn’t meant to prove anything.

It’s simply meant to open a door.

A door to curiosity.
A door to reflection.
A door to exploring the deeper questions of life without fear or pressure.

So here’s the question I’d love for you to sit with today:

**If a God existed…

what kind of God would you hope He is?
And why do those hopes exist at all?**

Whether you’re exploring faith for the first time, or returning after a long detour, or simply wanting to understand Christianity in a more thoughtful way — you’re welcome here.

Let’s walk through these questions together.
Gently. Honestly. One step at a time.